Hotaru's Desire
by DragonStar1
Summary: We know Hotaru and Chibi-Usa have a unique and special friendship...how far does it go? This takes place when Chibi-Usa goes to the past in S, but I made her about 5 years older.


I sat alone again in my room in the Crystal Palace. It was light and made of fantastic Crystal, yet, I was alone. I looked around from bookshelf, to wall, to door, to tapestry, and back to the door, which opened slightly. My heart jumped as I stood staring eagerly at the door, still only a crack open. I walked closer, hoping to see a hint of her pink hair, but to my dispair, I saw only a hint of green. Micheru opened the door a little more and poked her head in, looking around, her eyes finally landing on the lonely me.  
  
"Hello miss Micheru." I said polielty yet dryly.  
  
"Hotaru," she began sadly, "Chibi-Usa hasn't returned from the past yet?" I shook my head. She looked sad and lonely too. "Haruka went to go talk to Pluto. She's going to go and get her if she doesn't return soon." She said, still leaning on the half-way open door.  
  
"Come in and have a seat." I motioned her to come in and she walked in, closing the door and sitting in the big purple chair I had next to a rug of the universe in my room.  
  
"........." She just sat and stared at me for a few minutes, not sure what to say, not wanting to offend me. Frankly I was having a hard time trying to figure out what I could say to her too. If I mentioned Haruka, I was almost positive she'd burst out in tears, and if I mentioned Chibi-Usa...I'm sure I would.  
  
"Micheru?" I said quietly as I sat back down on my bed, careful not to crinkle my dress too much.  
  
"Hm?" She responded, surprised at me starting a conversation.  
  
"W-What's it like?" I asked shyly. I could feel my face getting hot, and the tips of my ears turning red.  
  
"What's what like?" She asked honestly clueless. I tried to think of a nice way to put it.  
  
"Having a GIRLFRIEND?" I asked, now positive that my entire face was beet red.  
  
"Oh." She responded plainly. "Why?---nevermind." She stopped short and I looked up, my heart pounding, making it's way to my throat, or so it seemed. "Do you have someone special?" She asked, coming and sitting with me on my bed. I didn't feel lonley anymore, when she sat on my bed with me. I felt wanted, and loved.  
  
"Well.....y-you see----" I started, but she interupted me, putting her hand on mine. Now she was only a matter of inches from me.  
  
"You like Chibi-Usa?" She whispered softly and lovingly in my ear. I was shocked. She hit it right on. Chibi-Usa means everything to me. She was the only person who liked me for who I was and didn't care anything about the stupid rumors she heard. All she knew was that I was Hotaru, her friend, her---  
  
"She's my special friend." I said, not realizing I had said that aloud at first, and soon regreting it.  
  
"That's exactly how it is with Haruka and me." She said and moved closer to me. Too close. I moved over a little, but ran out of room when the bed ended. "Don't worry. She'll be back soon. They both will, and then neither of us will be lonley anymore." She said in a mother-like tone that comforted me. It was different having someone who cared about me other than Chibi-Usa or Queen Selenity(Usagi). I didn't have many friends, even among the Sailor Senshi.  
  
"Thanks Micheru." I said polietly, and she leaned over, kissed my cheek and got up. "Can you do me one favor though?" I asked as she headed for the door. She turned, her green dress sweeping the floor. "Don't tell Chibi-Usa. I don't want her to know. She may think I'm weird and---"  
  
"You're afraid of losing her." She finished and, still in the same place close to the door, she turned compleatly toword me and said, "If you tell her, you think she may reject you. But listen, Hotaru, if you don't you may have missed out on the best moment of your life. And, if she does reject you---I'll always be here for you. You remember when you were little? You used to call me 'mama', and you called Haruka 'papa'. Just think of us as that, and you'll never really be alone." She finally finished and siletly walked out the door. She closed it behind her, leaving me, sitting on my bed thinking to myself--- Is that really what I wanted to hear? Is this really who I am? What about Ellios? Doesn't she love him? Oh! She'll definetly reject me if she does!!--- the door opening interupted my thoughts, and to my delight it was Chibi-Usa. She was still in her sailor uniform, breathing hard from runing up all the stairs. She was older now. We both were. We were old enough to handle the fact of our desires.---I think---  
I stared for a moment at her. Her volumonus pink hair now almost down to the ground, it was layered and had a bright healthy sheen to it. Her eyes full of tears of joy, at the happiness of seeing---me? She walked slowly towards me--- Chibi-Usa, don't...I don't want you to get yourself involved with me...Ellios...he's the one for you...I feel guilty...---She continued to walk forward and to my surprise sat right down next to me on my bed. I couldn't tell her to get off...I stared at her beautiful red eyes and was lost. Her face was so welcoming, so kind and innocent, just like the first day I met her. There was something about her that I just couldn't love. I mean really LOVE.   
  
"Hotaru. I missed you^_^" She said in her normally pearky tone. I was getting antsy and I couldn't hold my feelings back anymore---I could see the look she gave me, the worried expression on her face. "Hotaru?" She asked and moved herself a little closer. I couldn't control it anymore, I leaned over and kissed her, putting my hand around her head. She pulled back a little at first, but came back and held me close. I was loved. I was finally loved--not just by anyone, but by someone who understood me and my crazy desires because we had that in common. The kiss seemed to last forever, it was as if I could live in the moment. She put one arm around me and played with my hair with her other hand. I had never had anyone do that to me before, and I pulled back reluctantly seperating our lips. She sat, still with her arm around me, both of mine arond her neck, drapped over her shoulders.  
  
"Chibi-Usa...I'm sorry..." I pulled back ashamed of myself.  
  
"........" She wasn't quite to sure what to say. "You love me...don't you?" She asked me finally.  
  
"Well...yes. With all my heart. You mean a lot to me. Maybe...maybe more than you'll ever know." I said, still ashamed of my lesbian behavior.  
  
"If you love me, then what are you apologizing for? You didn't lie." She said and played with my hair some more.  
  
"Well...it's just that......Ellios...I mean you love HIM, don't you?" I asked, looking up finally as she brought her hand to my face and ran her finger along the contours of it.  
  
"Ellios is my boyfriend. Nothing's going to change that. I love you BOTH. Nothing's going to change that. What has changed is, we just brought our relationship to a new level. I can have a husband and a best friend. There's no rule that I can't. You just seem to be a little more adimint about it that's all." She said and with her other hand began to play with my chooker.  
  
"I guess you're right. So, we're still friends?" I asked, and leaned over.  
  
"Of course." She said and kissed me again, playing with my hair, and her other hand around my waist. We both fell over back onto the bed and sat there, starring at the ceiling for a while.  
  
"I love you, Chibi-Usa-chan." I said laying on my back.  
"I love you too. Hotaru-chan." She said, laying on my lap.   
  
  
~Finis~ 


End file.
